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By Michael Mintzer, CPA

Like other professional service providers, accounting professionals regularly navigate conflicts and opposing viewpoints. Whether that may be addressing feedback with junior staff, setting work-life boundaries with a manager, or negotiating fees with a client, accountants face a variety of internal and external interpersonal pressures during normal business operations.

The smooth and timely resolution of these difficult conversations is more than just a soft skill. It is critical for both employee retention and the firm's financial health. According to a study by the Workplace Peace Institute, 53% of respondents said they feel stressed due to workplace conflict, and 45% reported sickness or absence from work. This results in U.S. employers losing over $3,000 per employee per year in productivity.¹ Firms with over 100 employees may experience $300,000 in lost productivity revenue annually.

Employees frequently report that avoidance is their most common coping mechanism for difficult conversations. Sure, this can provide short-term relief, but it severely harms long-term productivity and relationships. The only way to become comfortable handling difficult conversations is through practice. Employees should regularly train in handling difficult conversations. Here are 10 strategies and approaches:

• Define Your Goal – Clearly define what a successful conversation looks like to you and what you hope to achieve. This helps keep discussions on track and makes it easier to measure success.
• Breathe and Center Yourself – If you feel anxious or tense, take a few deep breaths to calm yourself. Approaching a conversation from a place of calm, rather than anxiety, is crucial for a productive outcome.
• Schedule with Intention – Set a specific time and place to talk. Prepare your key talking points in advance, but avoid memorizing a script. A good conversation is a fluid exchange, not a performance.
• Use "I" Statements – Frame your points from your own perspective to avoid sounding accusatory. Instead of "You never listen," try, "I felt unheard when we discussed this last week." This keeps the conversation respectful and open.
• Actively Listen – Focus on what the other person is saying, not just waiting for your turn to speak. Ask clarifying questions and take notes. The goal is to ensure you fully understand their viewpoint before you respond.
• Stay on Topic – Keep the conversation focused on the main issue. It's easy for a discussion to spiral into old grievances. Gently redirect the conversation back to your original goal if it gets off track.
• Validate Their Perspective – Show the other person you hear them by summarizing their points. You don't have to agree, but by saying something like, "What I hear you saying is..." makes the other party feel heard and creates a collaborative atmosphere.
• Collaborate on Solutions – Instead of approaching the conversation as a debate to be won, work together to brainstorm solutions. This approach builds trust and leads to an outcome that both parties can support.
• Know When to Pause – If the conversation gets too heated or you reach a stalemate, it's okay to suggest a break or reschedule another meeting. This prevents a productive conversation from turning into a fight.
• Follow Up in Writing – After the conversation, send a brief email summarizing the key points and any agreed-upon actions. This creates a shared record and helps avoid future misunderstandings.

Mastering these strategies can directly impact a firm's culture and bottom line. By proactively applying these techniques from defining your goals to collaborating on solutions you can transform what were once sources of stress into opportunities for growth and trust. This shift from avoidance to productive dialogue builds a culture of open communication, ensuring not only individual success but a healthier, more resilient firm for everyone.

¹ Robyn Short, " State of Workplace Conflict in 2024: Insights and Solutions," Workplace Peace Institute (Aug. 21, 2024). 

Michael Mintzer, CPA, is a resource manager with Maillie LLP in West Chester, Pa. He can be reached at mmintzer@maillie.com.

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^{Statements of fact and opinion are the authors’ responsibility alone and do not imply an opinion on the part of the PICPA's officers or members. The information contained herein does not constitute accounting, legal, or professional advice. For actionable advice, you must engage or consult with a qualified professional.}